Monday, July 6, 2015

The Listing of a Year-Long Health Crisis

June 2014
Healthy and active gym member
New seizure medication
Severe muscle pain
ER, MRI, CAT scan, x-rays
No diagnosis
Ice pack hidden under scarves at work
Chiropractor, primary care physician, neurologist
August 2014
Pain continues
Useless over-the-counter meds and muscle relaxers
Work at 8 a.m. sharp
Numbness in arms and legs, vertigo, jackhammer tapping in ears
Unable to hold books without limbs going numb
September 2014
Pain continues
Writing packet due to graduate mentor
Heating pads hidden under scarves at work
Pain in sitting; pain in lying down
Reruns of Law and Order while standing until 1 a.m.
Debilitating dizziness
ER again
Massage therapy
EMG, blood tests
Scary blood test results
Tested positive for scleroderma (elephantitis, The Elephant Man disease. Like the movie, like the play)
Reading due for grad program
Work at 8:00 a.m.
Grateful for legs that move pain-free  during a walk
Scared and sleepless
Reruns of Law and Order
November 2014
Pain and stress continue
Son arrives home from overseas
Oxycotin please? Nope.
Change seizure medication
Cancel gym membership for the first time in 20 years.
A second positive test for schleroderma, The Elephant Man disease
Remember gratitude:
Healthy eyes absorbing snow covered trees outside
Healthy ears to absorb music

Kind friends joining me in the ER
And the sound of sons laughter during a visit
Legs that walk pain-free
A sweet, concerned husband
A meal cooked by a thoughtful neighbor
The prayers of many, near and far
December 2014
Everlasting pain?
Heating pads tied to head and neck
Four more MRIs
Walk in the snow like a slow old woman
Magnesium, epsom salts, vitamin B, special diet
More Law and Order re-runs
Work at 8 a.m.
Christmas shopping in pain
Generous co-workers donate vacation time
Christmas in bed
Disheartened, worried, scared, distracted
Stranger in the mirror
Copyedits due for graduate thesis
January 2015
Pain continues
Unable to sit, even in doctor’s office
Third test for Schleroderma. Negative!
Hopeful words from the rheumatologist: “Someday you’ll slowly walk out of this.”
A laugh
A smile
Intermittent Family Medical Leave from work.
March 2015
Decreasing pain    
Three steps forward, two and a half steps back

Toxic seizure med clearing my system
Muscles returning to normal
Finish graduate thesis
May 2015
A new chiropractor. Occupational therapy. Physical therapy.
Three steps forward, two steps back
Pain-free sitting, standing, lying down
Three steps forward, one step back
July 2015
The end in sight


Stephanie Rische said...

Oh my, what a year. Sometimes miracles are instant, and sometimes they're the slow variety. Thanks for finding beauty in the ashes.

Linda MacKillop said...

Thanks for walking this road with me, my friend.